Monday, August 30, 2010

Moral science class

Do you remember those unending moral science lessons we used to have at school? The ones where there was always a moral of the story at the end and how the teacher tried all the tricks just stopping short of drilling a hole into your brain and stuffing into it.

Well,our dear,kind and well meaning friends from bollywood, Karan Johar (with a 'K') and Shahrukh (marketing) Khaaann (from the epiglotis) decided that all eez infact not well with the world (as the other khan said),and that it was time the world got its moral science lesson from no less than the self proclaimed moral men of the hindi movie industry !!

And so they set upon in their mission of making "save the world " sorry, "my name is khan" (although the former suits it better). Now there is nothing wrong in making feel good movies or movies that are made to send home a message.

But when every scene in the movie(right from the titles) begins and ends with a "moral of the scene " narrated by no less than moral khan himself in that droning,flat voice for 3 hours I seriously begin praying for superman (cue:Homer simpson) to save me.Agreed that the leading man is autistic and that he cannot feel emotions,but how on earth does he wish that he could cry like his brother does? I mean, isn't that an emotion for god's sake ??

Picture this: Moral khan is in the middle of a busy road (in US of A) and suddenly gets a panic attack. He is on a tram track and the speeding tram just stops short of ramming into him. Everyone gets out and crowds around the man making him panic even more. Time for introduction of lady love. What does she do? Does she physically move him to the other side of the road and calm him down? Does she offer him water? No,people,this is a KKKaran johar movie. So out comes miss smarty pants and goes about offering a lecture on courage,facing life,struggling through life and basically all that an autistic man caught in he middle of the road in a panic attack doesn't want to hear. Now that is a master directorial touch.

After 30 minutes of sitting through this torture, I started feeling as if I was sitting on a chair waiting to be electrocuted. The endless phoenetic lessons on how to pronounce "Khan" didn't help much in reducing the pain.

So I'm off now to make my prayashcithams that my josiyar advised me to fulfill to wash off the sin.
3 back to back viewings of "Rain man" and one full reading of class V moral science book.

PS: Appeal to KKaran Johar. Please go back to making your "Krap" movies. Yes,they were no better,but at least I didn't end up feeling like stabbing the first living thing I saw !!

PPS:Mr.Saarukhan,we loved you as Rahul,Raj,Jai romancing in Alps. If that and the fact that you've been around from my school days have give you so much confidence that you can unleash such torture upon us, I take back all those wolf whistles,crushes etc that I had once upon a time.
Experience cannot in any way make up for talent. And that is the reason we love Rajinikanth. He sticks to what he does best,punch dialogues and feel good movies. Thalaivar vaazhga !!( ok that was unnecessary,but who cares ;-) )

2 comments:

Sriram said...

LOL :D I wonder if u've seen this - Just came to mind.. http://krishashok.wordpress.com/2010/03/01/controversy-is-the-new-advertising/

Niranjani said...

yeah ,I've read that soem time back.Krish Ashok at his sarcastic best:-)